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A young couple got married and left on their honeymoon. When they got back, the bride immediately called her mother. "Well, how was the honeymoon?" asked the mother.
"Oh, mama," she replied, "the honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic." Suddenly she burst out crying. "But, mama, as soon as we returned, Stan started using the most horrible language. He's been saying things I've never heard before! All these awful four-letter words. You've got to come get me and take me home. Please mama!"
"Frannie, Frannie," her mother said, "calm down! Tell me, what could be so awful? What four-letter words has he been using?"
"Please don't make me tell you, mama," wept the daughter, "I'm so embarrassed. They're just too awful! You've got to come get me and take me home. Please mama."
"Darling, baby, you must tell me what has you so upset. Tell your mother these horrible four-letter words." Still sobbing, the bride replied, "Oh, Mama, words like dust, wash, iron, and cook . . . "
"Oh, mama," she replied, "the honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic." Suddenly she burst out crying. "But, mama, as soon as we returned, Stan started using the most horrible language. He's been saying things I've never heard before! All these awful four-letter words. You've got to come get me and take me home. Please mama!"
"Frannie, Frannie," her mother said, "calm down! Tell me, what could be so awful? What four-letter words has he been using?"
"Please don't make me tell you, mama," wept the daughter, "I'm so embarrassed. They're just too awful! You've got to come get me and take me home. Please mama."
"Darling, baby, you must tell me what has you so upset. Tell your mother these horrible four-letter words." Still sobbing, the bride replied, "Oh, Mama, words like dust, wash, iron, and cook . . . "
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At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Austin seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of Adam's rib. Later in the week, Wendy, his mother, noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and asked, "Austin, what's the matter?"
Little Austin responded, "I have a pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife."
Little Austin responded, "I have a pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife."
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Because I couldn't unplug the toilet with a plunger, I had to dismantle the entire fixture, no small feat for a non- plumber. Jammed inside the drain was Barney the purple rubber dinosaur, which belonged to my five-year-old son.
I painstakingly got all the toilet parts together again, the tank filled, and I flushed it. However, it didn't work much better than before! As I pondered what to do next, my son walked into the bathroom. I pointed to the purple dinosaur I had just dislodged and told him that the toilet still wasn't working.
"Did you get Baby Bop (the green one), too?" he asked.
I painstakingly got all the toilet parts together again, the tank filled, and I flushed it. However, it didn't work much better than before! As I pondered what to do next, my son walked into the bathroom. I pointed to the purple dinosaur I had just dislodged and told him that the toilet still wasn't working.
"Did you get Baby Bop (the green one), too?" he asked.
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